Of Class

"By Him who holds my soul in His hand, I do love you." - Prophet Muhammad (P.B.U.H)

Like those words.

Class. Not Classrooms. You might know what i'm talking about. And where i'm heading. And pardon me, i'm going to spiral my mind on this weekend night.

Prophet Muhammad never taught us about class. That's the reason Allah sent him: to eradicate the practice of differentiating classes among people and bring to light that we are ALL the same.

We are ALL the same.

We are all the SAME.

We are ALL THE SAME.

I admit i do not have enough patience or even tolerance when i encounter a person who so much as give me a hint that they are downgrading a certain group of humans.

Once and twice, i've come across people whom i consider as my friend and a respected superior, and when they BOTH expressed their utter dislike of a certain race in Malaysia, i immediately lose my respect AND automatically kept my distance...it's more like, i closed my auric egg from their presence...call that my Achilles' heel, i'm bad in that way. Not that i don't appreciate them being direct and non-hypocritical. But these kinds of people make me break out in a rash. Figuratively.

Be aware that ALLAH created us all. HUMANS, with different FAITHS and COLOURS and CULTURES, for us to know each other and find GOD amongst each other's presence.

ANIMALS, be they the usual ones and even PIGS, are created by GOD.

HE just Commanded us not to CONSUME swine. HE did not ask us to shun them away or cringe when we see it. Those little unassuming piggies deserve our respect too.

Hmm assuming that there are some typical-minded people reading this...H1N1? Selsema babi? Ok. So it comes from them. IS IT THEIR FAULT??

WE HUMANS ARE THE ONES AT FAULT!!! FOR THIS BLOODY PANDEMIC THAT'S GOING ON!!

......

I actually screamed up there. My little mind is screaming. But it came out through my fingers and into here. I'm a frustrated person.


I'm frustrated when i see people with whom i am close to, actually have the nerve (genetically, the unfortunate thing) to DEGRADE others...indirectly. But they also have the bloody nerve to ask for the opinion of same person whom they are degrading regarding some matters which they do not know.

Let's just name this person, Vanilla. It's a she.

She looks plain. Like a normal everyday 'makcik' you see everyday. OUTWARDLY. Her clothes are plain. You can say, 'selekeh' at times. Her behaviour? Let's just say she 'marches to her own drummer', does what she likes, likes what she does. She's acting young for her age. She's a non-conformist. She says what she thinks, straightaway. Clearly, that's a creature that society would not accept.

The particular people who look down on her thinks she has no class. No CLASS. NO class. They are much more stylish. More knowledgeable. More savvy. More interesting. More sane. More polite. More religious. Some say she would go to hell for all that she has done.

I am the observer of Vanilla and this, let's call them Savvy group with Class. I am able to put myself on the outside, looking in. Call me neutral. Switzerland.

From what i see, they are more shallow and superficial, compared to Vanilla.

They say she is materialistic. She say she's MONEYlistic, and it is true. There is a difference. She cares about MONEY. Not things that we can buy with it. That's just her. And she makes a fine accountant.

They say she's not polite and rude, does not know manners and what is appropriate, in some social situations. She knows. She knows wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy much more than they do. About 100 years earlier. She just doesn't BOTHER to SHOW that she knows etiquette. Especially when it comes to the Savvy group.

I say that she is well-trained in all matters pertaining to social conduct. When she is apparently 'misbehaving', she's having some freedom, in a free country, FOR GOODNESS SAKES. In fact what she was doing was not WRONG at all when you think about it after you wipe away your preconceptions about her.

They say she is not knowledgeable. I say that she knows alot of what we SHOULD know in this life.

Just because a person does not participate (even looks bored) in a conversation about politics and economy, that...does...not...mean...she...is...stupid. Enough said.

They see that she is not religiously inclined. I say, Vanilla is one of the important people in my life who taught me to communicate with my beloved ALLAH. You see, it's actually gone reversed. Savvy people are ones who received complete religious education. And end up as wannabe Westerners now. Vanilla is not from a consciously religious background. But she has AWARENESS. And it never changes with the times. Therefore, she is more FINER and more FIRM in her Iman.

You know i can write more. But i am mentally tired with this frustration. Of why people seem to JUDGE too much as if they KNOW so much about this WORLD.

ALLAH is my JUDGE. HE is FAIR and WISE.

I have no words to describe how much i revere my CREATOR.

My love, my heart, my soul is all in HIS hands.

I have been a bad person.


Observing can be very tiring.

I Need to Talk With You Again...

Haiiii....those good old teenage years i had...was so so pretty sweet....some bitterness thrown in too but the sweetness overwhelmed it and never tampers with my memory (eh?)

That title was a part of the lyrics to Kavana's song Will You Wait For Me. Don't like the song, but the video made me swoon. I repeat: SWOON over this beautiful guy....beautiful, beautiful, guy...heeheehee...argh men were still so manly back in the 90's.

Sorry younglings, that's my opinion :)

Anthony Kavanagh...one beautiful guy :) You see i can't stop praising him...eep!

Demolish this Shivering

I'm having a tiny problem. I hope it IS tiny. My hands are now shivering and seemingly moving on its own. I suspect there's something going on with my veins or some sort...

Ah, well....it is the weekend....after a presumably long and, i have to admit, boring work week....by Friday, my fears were proven wrong...sure i started the work week on a Tuesday (blame it on those monthly female pains...) and i got a slight irritation from a superior who asked me to do a certain job....but i did it anyway...

and it's going to take me about 2 weeks to get it done...

...and this week has been, nice. Fate has introduced me to my new neighbour and she seems to be one of my kindred spirits (too early to tell though). A Scorpio with loads of Libran in her. Cusp birth.

I was depressed yet again, but abit worse, added by the period misery...my appetite gave me a fright...oh but my blood pressure was down to 125/75, Alhamdulillah....

I actually 'lost grip' of my spirit, or WILL, to live. I even thought i lost my heart. It feels true.

But on one night...i dreamt. It was SO real. SO dark. SO many familiar faces from my waking life.

All of them are concerned about me. They kept telling me, persuading me, urging me, warning me, pointing out to me that....

I AM SELFISH.

"YOU ARE SELFISH, SYUHADA".

I think i got four people. I was a jubilant, ignorant character in my dream. I even got a mystery car which came to pick me up...

on some top floor of my 'office' building and it came in the elevator.

I woke up at 5:55 am. I was RESTORED. Fresh. I'm LIVING.

And the day was good.

My light blue inspiration came to me. Oh, the beautiful aura!

Even though i was still reserved....but it all came out well for me by Friday.


Today, i watched The Proposal. Nice movie. Sandra Bullock's movies always seem to be so nice for me to watch. And i don't usually WANT to watch these kinds of movies...


My hands are getting cramped. I'll stop here.